This day is for the f*ck it bucket....

Okay, I shouldn't say the whole day. I started off good. I hit the gym a little later than usual, at 5am for my cardio. But I still got in my hour and was feeling good. My day went on as usual (although I was tired because I just can't seem to get more than 4-5 hours of sleep a night), work was mellow, Cruz took a good nap, all was fine. After work I got home and began to work on the bills and budget. Well. It was all downhill from there. Now, Scott and I financially could live comfortably on our incomes. We are far from rich, but we do fine. The problem is, we had some set backs over the last year that put us behind. So, we continue to play that super fun catch up game until we can relax and be ahead in the game. When we get close, something dumb happens. It sucks. But anyway, enough of my boohoo financial state. My kids are clothed and fed, we have a roof over our heads and we are more fortunate than many others. But. Stressing over finances TOTALLY killed my afternoon workout and the rest of my day. It's crazy how that can happen. I got to the gym thinking hitting it hard would help relieve some of my stress and frustration. It didn't. I couldn't get it together. Scott was ready to do a hard leg workout but I felt weak and distracted and couldn't complete what he wanted me to do. It pissed me off. So, I bailed and went and did my own upper body workout. Which was shitty because we enjoy working out together, but today I just wanted to be alone. I am completely disappointed in myself and my half ass workout. I came home and have been pretty quiet. I really want Ben and Jerry's cookie dough ice cream and to watch Master Chef from last night. I feel emotional. But I can't blame it all on financial frustrations. Yet I don't have any other reason to feel this way. I know I'm tired, but I've been more exhausted before and didn't feel this way.... I don't know. My meals are prepped for tomorrow and that makes me happy.  I hope I can just sleep this off and wake up refreshed. Tomorrow is a new day and it's up to me to start it off right and let today go....